Top 70 Dinosaur Puns and Jokes

Every day, scientists learn something new about dinosaurs. Already in 2019, we have seen the discovery of a fossil that resembles a bat, the development of a robotic dinosaur model that can run on a treadmill, and the (continued) discussion of the causes of the extinction of these reptilian beasts. And while all that is interesting, I think you’ll find that dinosaur puns make for even better reading. You won’t be able to triceratops these dinosaur jokes, we’re almost positive.

Awesome Dinosaur Puns One Liner

1. My pupil asked which writer wrote the best dinosaur stories. I said he should try Sarah Topps.
2. Our local museum has opened a brand new dinosaur exhibit. I don’t know if it will be popular or not. That remains to be seen.
3. Why did Archaeopteryx catch the worm? Because it was one of the early birds.
4. What type of tool did prehistoric carpenters use? Dino-saws!
5. What do you call a dinosaur that only has one eye? An Eye-saur!
6. What do you call a smelly dinosaur fart? An exstinktion!
7. What do you call a dinosaur who is a noisy sleeper? A Tyranno-snorus!
8. What do you call a group of dinosaurs who sing? A tyranno-chorus.
9. Why can’t you hear a Pterodactyl when it goes to the toilet? Because the pee is silent!
10. What do you call a dinosaur car accident? A tyrannosaurus wreck!
11. WhIch is the scariest dinosaur? A Terror-dactyl.
12. Why are dinosaurs never overweight? Because they are surrounded by scales.
13. Why do museums exhibit old dinosaur bones? Because they can’t afford new ones!
14. Why did the Tyrannosaurus Rex cross the road? Because the chickens hadn’t evolved yet.
15. What is the best way to talk to a velociraptor? Long-distance!
16. What weighs 800 pounds and sticks to the roof of your mouth ? A peanut butter and Stegosaurus sandwich!
17. What do you do if you find a blue Ichthyosaur ? Cheer him up!
18. Why don’t dinosaurs ever forget? Because no one ever tells them anything!
19. What does a giant Tyrannosaurus eat? Anything she wants!
20. What’s the difference between a strawberry and a Tyrannosaurus? The strawberry is red!
21. Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch!
22. What do you get when a dinosaur walks through the strawberry patch? Strawberry jam !
23. What should you do if you find a dinosaur in your bed ? Find somewhere else to sleep!
24. Do you know how long dinosaurs should be fed? Exactly the same as short dinosaurs !
25. What do you need to know to teach a dinosaur tricks? More than the dinosaur !
26. How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow? Down in the mouth !
27. How much fur can you get from a dinosaur ? As fur as you can get!
28. Why do dinosaurs eat raw meat? Because they don’t know how to cook !
29. What did dinosaurs have that no others animals ever had? Baby dinosaurs!
30. Where was the dinosaur when the sun went down ? In the dark!
31. Did the dinosaur take a bath ? Why, is there one missing?
32. Why does a brontosaurus have a long neck? Because it’s feet smell.
33. What does a dinosaur call a porcupine? A toothbrush.
34. What is in the middle of dinosaurs ? The letter “s”!
35. Where do dinosaurs get their mail ? At the dead-letter office!
36. What’s as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing? Her shadow!
37. What’s green and hangs from trees? Dinosaur snot.
38. What do you get when a dinosaur sneezes? Out of the way!
39. What’s the best way to talk to a Tyrannosaur ? Long distance!
40. What dinosaur is always sad? Cry-a-lot-o-saurus
41. What do you say when you meet a two-headed dinosaur? Hello, hello!
42. Is it true that a dinosaur won’t attack if you hold a tree branch? That depends on how fast you carry it!
43. What do you call a dinosaur with one eye? A do-you-think-he-saurus.
44. How did dinosaurs decorate their bathrooms? With rep-tiles.
45. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A the-saurus.
46. Which dinosaur could never decide whether to leave or not? A stay-go-saurus.
47. How do sales people approach dinosaurs in clothes shops? Try, sir, a top?
48. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl when they go to the bathroom? Because the ‘P’ is silent.
49. What do you call someone who tells too many dinosaur jokes? A dino-bore.
50. What kind of dinosaur never gives up? A try-try-triceratops.
51. What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and cowboy boots? Tyrannosaurus Tex.
52. Which dinosaur should never stay out in the rain? A stegosau-rust.
53. What do you call a scared dinosaur? A nervous rex.
54. Which dinosaur always shoots first and asks questions later? Ammo-saurus.
55. What do you call a dinosaur who keeps you awake at night? A bronto-snore-us (or a dino-snore).
56. What does a T-rex’s play on at the playground? The dino-see-saw.
57. How do you know that a seismosaurus is under your bed? Because your nose is only two inches from the ceiling!
58. How can you tell if there’s an allosaurus lying in your bed? you’ll see the bright red “A” on its pyjamas.
59. What do you call a short spiky dinosaur that’s fallen down the stairs? Ankle-is-sore-us.
60. What do you call a dinosaur after they break-up with their girlfriend? Tyrannosaurus ex.
61. What do you get if you cross a T- rex with explosives? Dino-mite.
62. What did the dinosaur say to the cashier at the till? Keep the climate change.
63. What do you call a dinosaur ghost? A scaredactyl.
64. What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig? Jurassic Pork!
65. What do you call a dinosaur that knows a lot of words? A thesaurus!
66. How do you invite a dinosaur to a cafe? Tea, Rex?
67. What do you call a dinosaur that won’t stop talking? A dino-bore!
68. What do you call a dinosaur who sports a cowboy hat and boots? Tyrannosaurus Tex.
69. What do you call a T.Rex who hates losing? A saur loser.
70. What do you call a dinosaur that only has one eye? A Do-you-think-he-saurus.
71. What do you call a dog that belongs to a dinosaur with one eye? A Do-you-think-he-saurus rex.